BDSM and Entitlement

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I used to be quite upset when dommes have an entitlement complex, but truth to be told, a lot of that “Give me, I’m a superior being” stuff is something that does turn guys on. They aren’t forced, most actually look for financial dommes and while it’s not a fetish I understand, but hey, if it makes people happy, who really cares. I don’t think there would be FinDommes out there without guys looking for them and yeah, giving them money.

There always have been guys out there who decided that domination or BDSM should be free and on demand, I might have the odd rant about that, but there is seriously nothing wrong with seeking a life-style domme, just don’t shoot yourself in the foot, here’s a little bit of a manual what might work and what might not work if you’re looking for one: http://exdomme.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/domination-owed.html

Though in general if you are married, the chances of finding a life-style domme are slim, she might want commitment and you have already committed to your wife, and you should take that commitment seriously. There are odd cases where the domme is OK with it, that’s usually when the wife is informed and OK with it. It’s a bit hard to have a trusting relationship with somebody who’s betraying the partner. Pro dommes don’t have (or shouldn’t have) expectations outside of the usual, you know that you are keeping appointments, that you are clean and that you pay. You pay because you don’t have any other commitments, pro dommes won’t call you up in the middle of the night because they can’t sleep and want to talk, they won’t call you up to help with something, the relationship is professional, you don’t pay with your time, you pay in coin.

But now you got a new breed, nasty sub who thinks he’s entitled to sessions and somebody else should pay for it. He’s a good person, honestly, he ONCE gave 20 bucks to a guy (or so he claims) and people give to sports and cheerleaders, so why shouldn’t they give to him and his selfish wishes? I wonder if he realizes that sports is public enjoyment, will he broadcast his free session to give back to his “sponsors”? That alone is a reason to not sponsor him, ewwww…

This is getting funnier and funnier

The government programs you mention that exist in the US are socialist programs. They are forms of collectivism. The government forcibly takes (via taxes) from one person to provide welfare for another person. For some reason, a government nanny state is okay but what I suggest is not.

So first he whines about the cruel world where people don’t care about his little bit of happiness, but he considers welfare as something evil? I guess the children should starve so he can have his session, it’s only evil and socialist if it’s for others, I get it…

Considering that he doesn’t work (he claims an “anxiety disorder”), I think he might be on one of those evil socialist programs, you know this form of collectivism where the government robs one person to give to another… But we always have to remember that he is a very good person, I mean ONCE he gave $20…

I was reminded of a friend who lived with us for about 18 months, the guy is an ex special forces soldier, severe post traumatic stress disorder, didn’t stop him from doing what he could, because he never wanted to pick up a gun, he worked on building sites, didn’t earn a lot of money. I met him a while before he moved in, he always seemed to be a very kind soul, always made a fuss over the dog (good way to get into my good graces) and then later again when he was screwed over, company he worked for had folded owing him a lot of money, he had applied for unemployment benefits but the paper work dragged on, in the meantime he had lost his place to live and was sleeping rough. We invited him in, as we have a room we don’t use, not too big, not too fancy, but warm with a bed and furniture. This guy who really barely could make ends meet offered to pay rent, we had to make up stories that he’s doing us a favor because we need somebody to dog and cat sit for him to accept to live rent free.

Why I bring it up? Because of the difference! Our friend had a dream (teaching English in China) and he worked his ass off, despite his disability, he didn’t expect people to buy him a ticket, he didn’t want hand-outs, he didn’t feel entitled to free stuff.

He is somebody people respect, somebody who actually does stuff, no excuses, doesn’t expect handouts or people paying for him, as a result and because he’s the first one to lend a helping hand, people go out of their way to make his life a bit easier and help him where they can. Funny how that works…

Another thing I noticed with the charmer, he claims to be a submissive, oddly enough he’s quite deferential to men but amazingly rude to women… Hypocritical much?

But clearly not his own fault that he doesn’t get a free session, the world owes him one, really, we should all stop being so damned unfeeling. Who’s going first? I guess the proper way to approach him for a free session would be “And how may I dominate you today, Sir? And how many hours of my own time would you like me to waste on you? Clearly anything I plan to do and any work are not as important as your desire to be dominated…”

I think I just threw up a little…

And in case you wondered, yeah, he is the same as this guy : http://exdomme.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/domination-owed.html

Hey he might want to ask the Dire Straits, you know, money for nothing and your chicks for free

 

Domination owed?

OK, a thread on good old MF inspired this, might be a bit of a rant...

Let me give you the gist of it:

Guy wants domination, several hours of it, pro dommes are too expensive for him, he doesn't like life-style dommes as they make him jump through too many hoops. In short he wants instant domination, the way he likes it (not in a dungeon setting but their homes - anybody concerned about safety and letting a stranger into your house?) but that's it. He wants to show up and get his needs met, but claims it's all about the woman... Now dommes should give him the sessions for free or other guys should sponsor him...

Didn't meet with a lot of approval, apart from the true loose cannon on the board who's well known for his hatred of dommes (and to go on to a board that deals with professional domination, doofus really has some issues, maybe he's a masochist and gets his kicks that way?), oddly enough the original poster wasn't distracted from this, he kept continuing with his passive aggressive stuff, and the woman are mean bitches who attack him, when he just wants to live in a world where you don't need any money...

I can sympathize with the idea of an Utopia where no currency is needed, but I can't sympathize with the idea of being a free loader and that anybody has to prove sincerity by giving you stuff for free. If you shun all commercialism, don't expect play for pay for free, simple as that.

Can you imagine going into a restaurant and telling the chef that if he's truly passionate about food, he'll deliver a 5 star menue for free? Your favorite musician has to show up at your party and perform for free, your favorite painter will have to hand over his or her artworks for free, your accountant has to do your taxes for free - how else would you know that he's passionate about crunching numbers...

I really do not have a problem with people who want to get away from commercialism, in fact I find it admirable and we're trying to do something like that on a small scale, we're usually donating the money we would have spent for Xmas pressies to a charity and help out at a local shelter. Much more rewarding than sitting at home, overeaten and feeling a bit sick and it takes out the stress of finding presents...

What I do have a problem with is with people who are not willing to give (i.e. somebody who says and that is a direct quote Now, there are lifestyle dommes (as opposed to pro-dommes) who are less interested in money and more into domination. But they usually make subs jump through multiple hoops for extended periods of time before sessioning real time (such as mandatory cam sessions, long waiting periods, etc.) I am just plain out of sympathy for somebody who's a freeloader with an entitlement complex.
NO woman, and especially not dominant women are fetish delivery systems, obliged to dominate anybody who asks for it, or demands it. If you can't be bothered to show that you are sincere, you want it on your terms and when you want it (not when the woman feels ready or is in the mood), then pay for it.

The guy doesn't work, claims his wife knows about it and doesn't mind, so I suggested he might talk to her, she might actually love him pampering her and doing the household chores, but he claims she is too sweet for that, and he likes that she is a sweet and good natured girl, the one he fell in love with...

So essentially, the sweet girl shouldn't be sullied with dominance, those of us who are dominant are obviously some lower form of life who can be exploited by him at will. And he wonders why he's not getting anywhere?

Sorry, but I'm sticking with my plan to give money to the victims of Sandy, those people need food and shelter, I can't really see his need for a domination session that lasts for a few hours being quite as great as the need of the Sandy victims. Yeah, I know, I'm going to hell for being such an unfeeling and cold bitch, but you know what, I guess that is one good way to avoid the freeloader, aka professional victim....

That song is actually far too cool to dedicate it to him, but you get the gist...